With the clock marking the New Year midnight, many people consider goals to transform their lifestyle. However, what began with enthusiasm usually weakens for the fifth month. Specialists attribute this fall to a “motivation in pause”, product of the mental self -stabbage that occurs when the results do not arrive as fast as expected.
From psychology it is noted that it is not the environment that slows progress, but the mind itself. At an unconscious level, thoughts that sabotage our actions are generated, especially when the goals are not clear or have been imposed by social pressure.
Life coaches agree that defining specific and attainable objectives facilitates compliance over the planned time. Reevaluating the goals, adapting them or changing the way to achieve them can be key to resume the way and prevent them from being forgotten.
The romance of the goals and the fall of the impulse
It all starts with energy, but that, when reaching the fourth month, the enthusiasm weakens, says Silvia del Águila, trainer and business consultant. “Passing the fifth month, the priorities change and what I call ‘motivation in pause’ appears. Then we usually wait until the next new year to resume what we leave halfway,” he explains.
According to the expert, this happens because the brain enters a phase of demotivation. “During the first days, we fall in love with our healthier, productive and organized version, but it is intrinsic motivation, which, although it goes out, does not disappear: it only needs to reactivate.”
From the eagle investigations of the University College London that indicate that at least 66 days are required to create a habit, but warns that the real challenge begins on day 90: there the doubts arise, emotional wear and tear and return to old habits.
When the goal is not genuine
A goal is only held if it is authentic, explains Andrés Armas, neuroeducator and coach of life. “When I have a genuine desire, that enhances me. It is not something imposed, it is something that is born of me, and that makes it a reality,” he says.
Weapons adds that the main sabotage is not the environment, but the mind: “It is we, from the unconscious, who began to think: ‘I will not achieve that’, ‘It is impossible’, and thus the frustration appears.”
To strengthen a genuine goal, proposes three essential pillars:
- Patience
- Perseverance
- Faith
In addition, it recommends transforming what is necessary into a personal desire. For example, it is not enough to know that going to the gym is healthy; You have to believe it and visualize it as part of the development itself. “The essential step is to feel it as your own, install it in the mind and affirm it: I can achieve it,” he explains.
Experts detail that pause motivation happens because the brain enters a demotivation phase. (Photo: Free Press / Shuttersock)
Behind the abandonment: Why do we lose interest?
Goals such as adopting healthy eating, exercising or quitting smoking are usually abandoned because it is not possible to incorporate change as part of the daily routine, explains Ximena Fuentes Molina, clinical psychologist and couples therapist.
Another factors, which points out, is that many people try to modify their habits drastically and suddenly, which is unsustainable in the long term. “The key is to focus on gradual and sustainable changes, which are integrated as usual,” he says.
Sources identifies three main causes of the abandonment of goals:
- Lack of realism: The goals are too ambitious or do not fit personal reality
- Lack of planning: There is no clear plan with defined steps and times
- Loss of motivation: The initial enthusiasm decreases if there are no visible results or if unexpected obstacles arise
The psychologist also warns that the rigidity when evaluating the achievements can be harmful. “Relapses are part of the process. The important thing is to learn from them and move on,” he concludes
Read more: How to achieve the objectives: Techniques not to abandon goals in this 2025
Practical keys to build sustainable goals
The three specialists agree that reaching a goal is not only will, but of structure, consciousness and accompaniment. Next, some shared strategies to resume the goals and maintain them:
Steps to meet goals
- Define specific goals: Be clear about what you want to achieve
- Make them measurable: Establish indicators to evaluate your progress
- Make sure they are attainable: They must be realistic and appropriate to your current resources
- Prioritize your goals: identify which are most important and make sure they do not contradict each other
- Establishes a term: Set reasonable limit dates that give structure
- Divide into steps: fragment your goals in smaller and more manageable objectives
- Create an action plan: Determine what concrete actions you will perform
- Measure your progress: Frequently monitor your advances and adjust the plan if necessary
- Remove yourself: Recognize and celebrate each achievement, however small, to maintain motivation
Silvia del Águila summarizes it like this: “Consider with the process, not with the weight. Enjoy moving, cooking healthy, waking you early. Celebrate every step: your brain needs rewards to move forward.”
Weapons adds: “Visualize yourself achieving your goal. Act as if you are already constant strengthens your neuronal connections. The brain creates what you repeat.”
The shared goals and the support network
Experts emphasize that resuming a goal with another person or with a mission partner is fundamental. Ximena Fuentes emphasizes that the environment is key to achieving or maintaining the objectives.
“Our support network is fundamental. People around us can remind us why we start and help us continue,” he says.
This motivation is reflected in practices such as attending gymnasium as a couple or relying on health professionals to maintain commitment. When a person is associated with others who share the same purpose, mutual support is key in moments of discouragement, which makes the most bearable process.
When resuming a goal means reconnecting with the sense of life
Armas concludes that, when a goal is lost, which has actually been lost is the sense of life. And recovering it does not depend on having more things, but on being.
“When reconnecting with ourselves and with our peace, we find motivation again. Starting is exciting, but starting again and continuing … transforms your life,” he says.
Reaching a goal is not only will, but of structure, consciousness and accompaniment highlights the psychologist Ximena Fuentes. (Photo: Free Press / Shuttersock)